7 biggest and fattest… My take

Warning: This is a long post.

Disclaimer: All opinions stated are mine alone and based on my own experiences. If we don’t share the same opinion, it’s okay lang po. It doesn’t mean that either of us is wrong. My opinions also do not affect how I view the weddings of my couples or how hard I will work to give a couple the best wedding possible.

The other day, I posted an article published in Better Homes and Gardens about the 7 biggest and fattest complains of wedding guests. I know some were very American but I think a few can also be applied in our setting.

1. Cash Bar. The article said to do away with cash bar because it was tantamount to telling guests to “pay to celebrate our love”.

Couples with catered receptions (held in wedding venues) normally do not have this problem since most caterers offer free-flowing drinks (soda, iced tea, juices) and do not charge corkage for liquors brought in.

Having a cash bar is a problem more for hotel receptions since most hotel packages only include one round of drinks for all the guests.

But before I discuss this further, let’s enumerate the usual beverage arrangement options available in hotels:

• Cash bar for everyone after the first round of drinks
• Couple to host (i.e., pay for) all beverage orders of all guests on a per consumption basis
• Couple to host an open bar. There are different open bar choices: basic drinks like soda, juices, iced tea; basic drinks plus wines; basic drinks plus hard liquors, etc.
• Couple to host drinks ordered by the guests in the VIP tables but cash bar for “regular” guests
• Couple to set a limit (in terms of money) and the wait service team can just serve drinks to guests who ask for second round until that limit is reached

Is having a cash bar a bad idea? Admittedly, most of my couples opt for this. Sabi naman kasi sanay na naman daw yung Pinoy guests sa ganitong arrangement. They know naman na pag hotel weddings, one drink lang.

Personally, I would suggest to host the VIP tables. Ninongs and ninangs naman and parents. If the concern is that they would order super mahal na drinks, it’s possible to limit the available drinks to non-alcoholic drinks or to just soda and iced tea or to just chilled juices (and no fresh juices). Just ask the AE (account executive) and I’m sure an arrangement the couple is comfy with can be reached.

Rather than a cash bar, I would suggest to set a limit (say Php20,000.00) for guests who would want a second round of drink. It can be requested naman for the waiters not to actively offer a second round, just for those who really ask.

Bottomline, only the couple knows the guests so it’s only them who can decide which is the best arrangement.

2. Big Journey, Small Bites. The article advised to consider a seated dinner or buffet instead of a smattering of snacks for destination weddings.

Hmmm… I don’t think applies much to our setting because a seated dinner or a buffet is really the norm here. I would, however, suggest to serve something in the church before the wedding (kahit na bottled water lang) for those guests who travelled long just to witness your walk down the aisle. In one of my Tagaytay weddings, the couple actually served cocktails in the church courtyard. The guests were very surprised and touched that there was food for them.

3 and 4. All Fried Food and No Veggie Option. The writer advised to include a few healthful appetizers into the rotation to give your diet-conscious guests a break and to incorporate a meat-free entree option or a few hearty veggie-friendly sides and appetizers.

This always poses a problem if we’re not told beforehand that a guest has a particular food requirement. So please do take the time to know your guests’ food requirements. All hotels and most caterers would be willing to make arrangements naman. I remember one wedding, we were told by the couple that they have one table of vegetarian guests. I asked what kind of vegetarian and we were told na basta wala lang beef, chicken, and pork, okay na. During the reception, buti na lang one of the vegetarian guests came early. While I was showing him to his seat, he told me they were vegetarians. I proudly said that we were able to arrange special food for them and then I enumerated the food available to them. Nyaiks! He then told me they were su vegetarians. In his words, “hindi pwede ang humihinga” (hindi rin pwede ang mushrooms kasi fungi yun, humihinga yun. Ooops! Hindi rin pwede ang onions, leeks, shallots, and garlic.). And their food had to be prepared in separate skillets because it can’t be prepared in a pan na nalutuan na ng “humihinga”. Hay! It was a good thing the caterer was very efficient and we were able to come up with food for them.  Imagine! One whole table without food! Buti na lang naagapan. Baka naiyak ako!

5. Never-Ending Waits for Food Service. The bride and groom should take care to ensure that guests are not left waiting for an hour or more with nothing to do, eat, or drink.

This is a common problem. My favorite time to have the wedding mass is at 3:00 pm. I think that a 3pm wedding allows for the perfect timeline (Mass will be done  by 4:30 pm. Guests will be in the venue by 5:00 pm. Program can start at 6:00 pm) but I also super believe that cocktails should be served. If hindi kaya ng budget, kahit na nuts lang (Boy Bawang, Dingdong, Nagaraya, okay na yun, promise!). Hungry guests spell disaster.

If you’re planning to have a long pictorial session with the photographer (and with all the members of the entourage, to boot!), please make sure to serve your guests something… anything. We always get the hirit, “Iha, diabetic ako eh, matagal pa ba?” if cocktails are not served.

6. Running Out of The Big Ticket Entree. The author narrates being in a wedding and getting to the buffet only to see the featured whole roast pig gone, except for the pig’s snout.

Malamang Pinoy yung napuntahan niyang kasal.  May lechon eh. Hehehe!

I remember, years ago, meeting with a caterer AE and she told the couple, “Pag bumalik yung guest mo, dalawa na yung bilang sa kanya kaya magkukulang na yung pagkain.” I was so shocked! That particular caterer pala only expected the guests to go to the buffet table once so if a guest goes back, magkukulang nga naman ang food. Moral of the story, kahit na parang ang kulit pa ng dating niyo, please do ask your AE how much food is allotted per person. If they do it like the caterer I met with, please make adjustments on the number of reservations you’ll make.

7. The Wedding Cake Face Smash. Hmmm.. so not Pinoy. Please do not adapt.