Poignant. Priceless. Perfect.

About a year ago, I was super running late to an 11am meeting. 1030am na I was still in the office! We had an emergency I had to attend to so I was super stressed na. I was supposed to take the car but since I knew that in my state, I would cut everyone in the road or worse, get into an accident, I decided to take a cab instead. I knew had to tone down my stress level eh. I even took a Reader’s Digest with me so I had something to take my mind off the meeting and off the fact that I was late.

I told the driver my destination and to pass by wherever he think would bring us there the soonest possible time, then I started reading. Maya-maya I noticed we were in Sta. Mesa. No problem there so I resumed reading. Then suddenly, he turned left and entered the driveway of Prince Court. Natigilan ako. Motel ata yun. I was not 100% sure but it was mejo dark inside. Tapos naisip ko, “Hindi kaya re-rape-in niya ako? Pero mataba naman ako.” Sabay tingin sa katawan at tiyan ko. “Pero sabi nila hindi daw porket mataba hindi nare-rape! Naku, baka nga re-rape-in niya ko! Ano gagawin ko? Sisigaw ba ako ng saklolo?”

And then I saw light and we emerged into another street. I breated a sigh of relief! Wala na kmi sa motel.

After a few meters, I asked the driver, “Manong, motel ba yun?”

“Opo. Shortcut po yan.  Mas madali kasi kaysa umikot pa.”

Hay! Hindi naman pala ako mare-rape eh! Buti na lang.

I was with a friend recently whom I have not seen for a really long time (the last meaningful conversation we had, I was still a guidance counselor) and we were exchanging notes and adventures of our present lives. I told her the story below and we were laughing so hard by the middle of the story. I have actually already blogged about this in my old blog but it’s so buried that unless you read all the entries, you won’t find this.

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My Bus Ride

Hindi naman ako burgis. Maarte ako pero hindi naman ako sosyal. Pero parang ayaw ko na maulit sa akin ito.

My day started with Jojie not feeling well. So instead of attending my 1130am meeting, I moved it to 1pm and I brought him to the doctor instead. Hindi pa kami nakikita ng doctor, I had to go na or else I would be late. I got to the meeting around 5 minutes late so okay lang. Pero sa super duper dami ng pinag-usapan namin, we finished around 430pm. The bride, knowing that I didn’t have my car (nag-overheat ako nung isang araw and I needed to bring Arcy to the casa), asked if I would be able to go home. With confidence, I replied, “Oo naman, okay ako lang, ako pa!” I smiled and they left na.

Dahil hindi naman ako sanay sa Festival Mall (I live in QC), I asked around where I can get a cab. I was directed to the other side of the mall. Ang laki-laki ng Festival so ang layo ng linakad ko pero go lang. When I got to the taxi line, linapitan ako ng mga 4 na drayber at tinanong kung san ako pupunta. Sagot ko “Manong, Project 8 po pero may dadaanan lang ako sa Tektite”. At ang sagot nila ng lahat “Okay. Mga 1 thousand yun, iha, kasi sa Tektite pa lang seven hunded or eight hundred na.” Juice ko! “Ho? Para namang airport taxi!” “Eh magkano ba bayad mo papunta dito?” “Three hundred plus lang po, ako may sagot ng toll.” “Eh kami sagot na namin yung toll.” When I walked away, one of the drivers even caught up with me and haggled. Six hundred na lang daw hanggang Tektite. Juice ko! Ano ba yun!?

So I walked. May sign na “Bus Terminal” so sabi ko “Aba, bus na lang ako”. Ako pa, sinabi ko sa sarili ko na kaya ko namang mabuhay ng walang kotse at taxi. But I realized that it was drizzling and I didn’t want to get sick so I went inside the mall to buy an umbrella. Syempre sa kabilang dulo ng mall yung mga payong so bumalik ako dun at bumalik uli sa sakayan. On the way, I passed by National Bookstore to buy a magazine (Real Living). Sabi ko “Might as well spend for something na pwede kong gawin on the way home than pay P800 for a taxi ride!” Syempre pagbalik ko sa labas, wala nang ulan so walang saysay yung pagbili ko. Hahaha!

I walked to the “Bus Terminal”. Lo and behold, company buses pala siya! Hahaha! Since I’m naturally an adventurer, I walked lang. Hindi ko alam san papunta pero sinundan ko lang yung mga tao. Lakad ako hanggang umabot ng Alabang-Zapote road. Dala ko yung magazine ko at payong, bag, at files. Syempre while deciding what to do, I couldn’t resist buying streetfoods so kumain pa ako ng calamares sa daan (Piso lang isa. Lima binili ko. Masarap na rin. Isasawsaw mo sa suka.) Syemre bumili na rin ako ng pineapple juice. At syempre pati mani, pinadagdagan ko pa ng bawang dun sa manang.

Ito na, lahat ng bus na andun, papuntang Calamba! Hahaha! But I realized that every once in a while, may dumadaan na papuntang Crossing Ibabaw. So alam ko na may saysay na yung pinuntahan ko. Next goal was to actually ride a bus. So nakipag-habulan ako sa bus. Kasi hindi naman sila humihinto eh. Hahabulin ko sila. O di ba, isipin mo na ang dami kong dala at nakikipaghabulan ako. Sa arte kong ito!!! Hahaha! Nakasakay ako pero hindi aircon. Ayala Ilalim which is good and Crossing Ibabaw which is what I needed kasi I’d meet Jojie sa Shangri-La. PERO Sucat at Bicutan din. So ibig sabihin susuyurin niya pa yung Sucat at Bicutan! Pero sabi ko okay lang. Umupo na ako at kumain ng mani.

After 20 minutes, umabot na sa Metro Star (tama ba?) yung bus. Nakita ko na na maraming aircon buses dito so I got off and walked to the front of the bus pila. At least dun aircon yung mga bus. Eksakto, pagdating ko, Crossing Ibabaw yung bus! And, I couldn’t believe my eyes “Skyway Derecho”!!! I was so happy that I boarded the bus. Pag-akyat ko ng unang step, may bumababa na tatlong tao. I gave way syempre. Pag akyat ko uli, puno na pala yung bus. As in wala nang upuan ni isa! But I so wanted to ride this bus kasi “Skyway Derecho” eh. Sabi nung kunduktor, “Dito ka na lang, miss, kung gusto mo. Wala nang upuan eh,” referring to a can beside the driver. Hindi man lang upuan. Lata lang talaga. As in lata ng malaking Alaska. Or Promil kung sosyal ka. Pero dahil talagang nagmamadali ako, umupo ako. So ang liit ko ikumpara sa lahat ng tao. Mukha akong gusgusin at I’m sure mukha akong nakakaawa so I got my magazine and started reading. O di vah? Kahit na sa lata ako nakaupo, tungkol naman sa condo living ang binabasa ko! Hahaha!

When the bus reached Magallanes, many people got off and I decided to, too. I walked to the MRT station and rode the train to Shang. Sabi ko naman maarte ako pero hindi ako reklamadora and cowboy naman ako pero sana hindi ko na kailanganing umupo sa lata sa tabi ng drayber eber!

Sorry for the hiatus. I took a “vacation” and then an overseas couple came and my days (literally, as we would be meet in the morning and would part ways around 8pm everyday) were spent with them.

Anyway, I’m back.

Warning: This is a long post.

Disclaimer: All opinions stated are mine alone and based on my own experiences. If we don’t share the same opinion, it’s okay lang po. It doesn’t mean that either of us is wrong. My opinions also do not affect how I view the weddings of my couples or how hard I will work to give a couple the best wedding possible.

The other day, I posted an article published in Better Homes and Gardens about the 7 biggest and fattest complains of wedding guests. I know some were very American but I think a few can also be applied in our setting.

1. Cash Bar. The article said to do away with cash bar because it was tantamount to telling guests to “pay to celebrate our love”.

Couples with catered receptions (held in wedding venues) normally do not have this problem since most caterers offer free-flowing drinks (soda, iced tea, juices) and do not charge corkage for liquors brought in.

Having a cash bar is a problem more for hotel receptions since most hotel packages only include one round of drinks for all the guests.

But before I discuss this further, let’s enumerate the usual beverage arrangement options available in hotels:

• Cash bar for everyone after the first round of drinks
• Couple to host (i.e., pay for) all beverage orders of all guests on a per consumption basis
• Couple to host an open bar. There are different open bar choices: basic drinks like soda, juices, iced tea; basic drinks plus wines; basic drinks plus hard liquors, etc.
• Couple to host drinks ordered by the guests in the VIP tables but cash bar for “regular” guests
• Couple to set a limit (in terms of money) and the wait service team can just serve drinks to guests who ask for second round until that limit is reached

Is having a cash bar a bad idea? Admittedly, most of my couples opt for this. Sabi naman kasi sanay na naman daw yung Pinoy guests sa ganitong arrangement. They know naman na pag hotel weddings, one drink lang.

Personally, I would suggest to host the VIP tables. Ninongs and ninangs naman and parents. If the concern is that they would order super mahal na drinks, it’s possible to limit the available drinks to non-alcoholic drinks or to just soda and iced tea or to just chilled juices (and no fresh juices). Just ask the AE (account executive) and I’m sure an arrangement the couple is comfy with can be reached.

Rather than a cash bar, I would suggest to set a limit (say Php20,000.00) for guests who would want a second round of drink. It can be requested naman for the waiters not to actively offer a second round, just for those who really ask.

Bottomline, only the couple knows the guests so it’s only them who can decide which is the best arrangement.

2. Big Journey, Small Bites. The article advised to consider a seated dinner or buffet instead of a smattering of snacks for destination weddings.

Hmmm… I don’t think applies much to our setting because a seated dinner or a buffet is really the norm here. I would, however, suggest to serve something in the church before the wedding (kahit na bottled water lang) for those guests who travelled long just to witness your walk down the aisle. In one of my Tagaytay weddings, the couple actually served cocktails in the church courtyard. The guests were very surprised and touched that there was food for them.

3 and 4. All Fried Food and No Veggie Option. The writer advised to include a few healthful appetizers into the rotation to give your diet-conscious guests a break and to incorporate a meat-free entree option or a few hearty veggie-friendly sides and appetizers.

This always poses a problem if we’re not told beforehand that a guest has a particular food requirement. So please do take the time to know your guests’ food requirements. All hotels and most caterers would be willing to make arrangements naman. I remember one wedding, we were told by the couple that they have one table of vegetarian guests. I asked what kind of vegetarian and we were told na basta wala lang beef, chicken, and pork, okay na. During the reception, buti na lang one of the vegetarian guests came early. While I was showing him to his seat, he told me they were vegetarians. I proudly said that we were able to arrange special food for them and then I enumerated the food available to them. Nyaiks! He then told me they were su vegetarians. In his words, “hindi pwede ang humihinga” (hindi rin pwede ang mushrooms kasi fungi yun, humihinga yun. Ooops! Hindi rin pwede ang onions, leeks, shallots, and garlic.). And their food had to be prepared in separate skillets because it can’t be prepared in a pan na nalutuan na ng “humihinga”. Hay! It was a good thing the caterer was very efficient and we were able to come up with food for them.  Imagine! One whole table without food! Buti na lang naagapan. Baka naiyak ako!

5. Never-Ending Waits for Food Service. The bride and groom should take care to ensure that guests are not left waiting for an hour or more with nothing to do, eat, or drink.

This is a common problem. My favorite time to have the wedding mass is at 3:00 pm. I think that a 3pm wedding allows for the perfect timeline (Mass will be done  by 4:30 pm. Guests will be in the venue by 5:00 pm. Program can start at 6:00 pm) but I also super believe that cocktails should be served. If hindi kaya ng budget, kahit na nuts lang (Boy Bawang, Dingdong, Nagaraya, okay na yun, promise!). Hungry guests spell disaster.

If you’re planning to have a long pictorial session with the photographer (and with all the members of the entourage, to boot!), please make sure to serve your guests something… anything. We always get the hirit, “Iha, diabetic ako eh, matagal pa ba?” if cocktails are not served.

6. Running Out of The Big Ticket Entree. The author narrates being in a wedding and getting to the buffet only to see the featured whole roast pig gone, except for the pig’s snout.

Malamang Pinoy yung napuntahan niyang kasal.  May lechon eh. Hehehe!

I remember, years ago, meeting with a caterer AE and she told the couple, “Pag bumalik yung guest mo, dalawa na yung bilang sa kanya kaya magkukulang na yung pagkain.” I was so shocked! That particular caterer pala only expected the guests to go to the buffet table once so if a guest goes back, magkukulang nga naman ang food. Moral of the story, kahit na parang ang kulit pa ng dating niyo, please do ask your AE how much food is allotted per person. If they do it like the caterer I met with, please make adjustments on the number of reservations you’ll make.

7. The Wedding Cake Face Smash. Hmmm.. so not Pinoy. Please do not adapt.

Hahaha! I succumbed and indulged myself. I set up a new blog. Please visit

I am Clarice and this is my life

I was net surfing when I got came across this article.

The 7 biggest fattest wedding complaints
by Heather W. at Better Homes and Gardens

One year I went to a remarkable wedding — the bride was radiant, the groom gallant, the vows tear-inducing and the setting idyllic. The only problem? I was starving. Over the duration of the five-hour affair, I was only able to wrangle a few mini-squash blossoms and chicken skewers from the elusive caterers. Yet this was no shoestring-budget wedding — the champagne, venue, and wedding band were A-List, and the bride’s dress was, I’m told, in the five figures. My thought, en route to the nearest drive-through on the way home: Being frugal is fine, but don’t scrimp on the food.

Cash Bar
While your wedding needn’t be a bacchanalian free-for-all, let’s face it: Nobody likes a cash bar. It’s essentially saying, “Pay to celebrate our love”! If your budget is tight, consider pouring lower-priced wines and beer, with top-shelf options available for purchase. Another way to save when it comes to alcohol is with a signature cocktail in lieu of a full bar — fun, festive, and friendlier on the bottom line.

Big Journey, Small Bites
Destination weddings are lovely but can be pricey for guests. If people are traveling long distances or overseas for your wedding, they’ve earned themselves a sit-down meal. As destination weddings tend to be more intimate, consider a seated dinner or buffet instead of a smattering of snacks — your jet-lagged guests will thank you.

All Fried Food
While haute comfort food is whimsical, trendy, and hard-to-resist (Gourmet fried chicken! Sustainably-farmed sliders! Duck fat fries!), try to avoid a menu that’s excessively fatty. Include a few healthful appetizers into the rotation to give your diet-conscious guests a break — and potentially more energy on the dance floor.

No Veggie Option
According to an April 2008 poll, 3.2 percent of Americans claim to be vegetarians, and 10 percent claim to follow a “vegetarian-inclined” diet. So, for the sake of 3-10 percent of your guests, try to incorporate a meat-free entree option or a few hearty veggie-friendly sides and appetizers.

Never-Ending Waits for Food Service
Wedding reception purgatory: We’ve all been there. Standing in a hotel courtyard or milling in front of a church, overdressed, underfed, sneaking a glance at your watch while making pained small talk. While logistics of event planning vary, the bride and groom should take care to ensure that guests are not left waiting for an hour or more with nothing to do, eat, or drink. Low blood sugar is not conducive to celebrating.

Running Out of The Big Ticket Entree
One lively wedding I attended featured a whole roast pig, but by the time my table was given its turn at the buffet, all that was left was the snout. Planning a wedding isn’t an exact science — there are always last minute RSVPs (or people who don’t RSVP at all) or those who show up with unexpected guests, children, or food allergies. So, consider the snout and plan for a few extra guests (or extra hungry ones).

The Wedding Cake Face Smash
A curious tradition indeed. The bride and groom cut the cake under the joyous gaze of friends, family, and possibly religious figures, and then, to cement the union, the groom smashes a handful of pricey cake on the (impeccably made-up) bride. Who started this? Who actually enjoys this uneasy ritual? My humble opinion: Save the frosting frolicking for the honeymoon.

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Ah I know it’s so American and some might not be applicable to our setting but what do you think?

I’ll post my reaction entry as soon as I have finished it. Mahaba eh kaya matagal. Hahaha!

I have a new favorite photographer!!! Her name is Michele M. Waite and she’s SOOOOOOOOOO good!!! As in ang galing, galing niya! Ang catch, she’s from the US (Pacific Northwest to be exact).

Look at her pictures! Don’t they just speak of happiness?

Haaaay! Kelan ko kaya siya makakatrabaho? *Clarice gazes out of the window and wishes on the brightest star she sees*

AY! SCRATCH THAT! Bakit ko ba papangarapin yun!

Haaaaaaaaay!!! Kelan kaya ako makakapagpa-picture sa kanya? *Clarice goes out of the door and wishes on the moon para mas malaki na*

LOL!!

Something that most brides do not know, I do not read blog entries about me (either during the preps or after the wedding) nor do I read brides’ ratings of our team. I have learned my lesson the hard way. There was a time I tried it. Googled my name and saw a number of  blog entries. The first few were raving about how good our team was and how perfect their weddings were. Syempre ang haba ng buhok ko! Ay, blond pa! Bawal apakan! LOL! Then the fifth (or sixth or seventh… can’t remember na), didn’t give me a perfect rating. While reading it, I felt her rating was so unfair.  According to her, hindi ko raw binalik yung offertory candles after the wedding and may nawala daw kami na 2 disposable cameras. The offertory candles were offered. Out of 15 disposable cameras we put on the tables, 2 were taken home by the guests. We cannot naman conduct spot searches eh.  I cried after reading it. My friends and family know how much of my life I give to coordination. And then realized the absurdity of crying over something I can’t do anything about. I promised myself not to read ratings again. Lose-lose situation eh. If I read something raving, baka I’ll be complacent na next time. If I read something bad, I’ll be crushed (and really crushed I’ll be).

But last month, Kats, my October 10 bride last year, sent me an email of her ratings. At first, I thought sending it to me was a mistake on her part. But as I scanned through it, I realized that she wanted me to read what she wrote.

She explained in the ratings that she perhaps other brides who’ll read what she wrote would be able to learn from the mistakes she did. And since I firmly agree with what she has written, I am now sharing with you Kats’ story, in her own words.

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A dream wedding-come-true is most girl’s lifelong wish. I wish I could say I’ve gotten mine. But through the journey of planning my wedding and finally having lived it, I learned too late that amidst the celebration and all the glitter and pomp, I lacked something that could have made it “perfect”.

And so, five months after my wedding, I’ve finally come to terms with having lost that dream and had reflected on important lessons that I had learned along the way. And thus, here is my suppliers’ ratings, as part of being a W@W bride. I hope you’ll learn something as well as you read on and perhaps you will be able to reflect on your own experience as a bride-to-be and be reminded not to commit the same mistakes that I had made with mine.

First and foremost, to give you a brief background, I’ve been in a relationship with my now-husband Harvey for ten years before finally deciding to tie the knot. I’m a very OC person and I dreamt of my wedding day since I was a kid. Our wedding was two years in the making and I’ve planned it up to the minutest detail like a tactician.

Now that we’ve gotten that fact—that I wanted a perfect wedding so bad that I spent most of my waking hours for two years planning for it—settled, please read on and find out how my suppliers did for that special day and what ruined it for me.

{ SNIP! SNIP! SHE ENUMERATES AND RATES ALL HER SUPPLIERS }

And finally, last but not the least,

COORDINATOR – Clarice Anne Aviñante of Events by Clarice – I couldn’t ask for more. Ms. Clarice saved our big day when I parted from my former coordinator three weeks before our wedding (narrated in my earlier post). I knew I was asking a lot from her but I thank God she agreed to help me out in such short notice. She took care of all the details, and carried the burden that I was supposed to bear. She gave me the chance to take a breather. She was very professional. She was gentle but firm, bubbly and yet very competent and able. Do not be deceived by her Chiz Curls curly hair. She delivered, exceeded my expectations, was loved by my entourage, was admired by my mom, and she became a friend. She was the one who brought me back to the real meaning of the wedding. I was so much focusing on the celebration that I’ve completely forgotten I was marrying my best friend. She made my wedding as I’ve planned it to be, she took care of the details and shielded me from the glitches that I did not even notice. She and her staff were very efficient, they worked so well even under pressure, and covered things that my two-year planning and rigid OCness had missed. They were that good.

So now you want to know, why wasn’t it perfect after all the rave reviews? Well, my dear W@W sisters, the problem was ME. I spent nights strategizing, planning, tying loose ends, obsessing over details, stressing over back up plans that I neglected my health and my work. I wasn’t sleeping, I wasn’t eating well, I was SICK on my wedding day! I threw up twice in the bridal car, kept on coughing during the ceremony, and was on bed rest two days prior to the wedding. I neglected a lot of things at work, took so much time on leave to do wedding stuff, that I had to catch up and was still working in my office until two days before my wedding!

I wasn’t able to enjoy the moment, I wasn’t able to savor that day. I merely saw how beautiful it was days after the wedding, after I’ve gotten the DVDs from our photographers, after hearing feedbacks from friends and guests, and then regretted not letting go and for not living it as I had always dreamt it should be.

Today, five months after, I’ve finally come to terms with my failure and my disappointments, and I’ve finally found the heart to write my story.

And so now, W@W sisters, thank you for reading this far and I hope you’ll get to enjoy and savor every minute of your big day. You get to do it only once, you get to live it in only few short hours, a wedding need not be perfect for you to enjoy it. Take a break, let go of the small stuff, let go of excessive OCness, and trust God. I guarantee, you’ll be “perfectly” fine.

Yours truly,
Harvey and Kathy
October 10, 2009
Christian Bible Church of the Philippines
EDSA Shangri-la Hotel

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Thanks so much to Kats (and Harvey) for allowing me to repost her email in my blog. Love you guys!

Around June last year, while in a fitting, my phone rang. Since I was in a fitting, I didn’t want to answer it but it seemed to be from an overseas bride so I excused myself and answered the call. It was indeed an overseas bride pero hindi ko pa bride, inquiry pa lang. She said she was interested in getting us and if I can just send her the contract.

What followed was an email exchange which eventually led her to book us for her wedding.

Juvy was an OC bride. Super funny, I was asking her for an online meeting and she said malayo pa naman her wedding and para hindi na daw siya makadagdag sa load ko (di ba soooo considerate?! I love her!) so I asked her to email me her list of suppliers. When she did, nobela pala yung concerns niya sa bawat isa! Hahaha! Siya rin found it funny na madami pala siya tanong. So we ended up meeting online anyway.

A few months after, I discovered something that she did for me. Something happened which made me really sad, yung tipong iniyakan ko ilang beses. Even without meeting me yet and really knowing me, she was there for me. Hindi naman niya ako kelangan tulungan but she did. And I was touched beyond words and I felt so blessed to have a bride and a friend like her. And I promised myself that I would give her a beautiful wedding.

Juvy and Laurence tied the knot last month. Theirs was, as cliche as it may sound, a simple but a really elegant wedding. I was so happy after her wedding. I thanked God for making everything work out well. I was so touched by her mom. When she saw me in the driver’s seat of my van, she came up to me, touched my face with both her hands, and thanked me. I was humbled.

Juvy emailed me a couple of weeks after the wedding to thank me. I replied with a short thank you na hindi na masyado maarte but I hope she realizes how thankful I am to her for trusting me with her wedding and for everything else.

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Hi Clarice! =)

Again, thank you, thank you so much. 

I remember reading Erich Segal’s Love Story in college. My mom and my tita warned me that they cried when they read it. Intrigued and because I absolutely loved Erich Segal, I borrowed a copy. Because the book was so thin, I finished it in one sitting. And I cried and cried and cried and cried.

Beautiful in its simplicity, Love Story tells of the story of Oliver and Jennifer, two opposites who met, fell in love, defied odds, and got married… only for their life together to end so abuptly.

After a meeting a few weeks back, I brought Jia to Powerbooks and I saw a copy of Love Story. I bought it and read it when I got home. Before I knew it, I was crying again. And crying and crying and crying. I cannot imagine going through something as painful as losing the person you chose and planned to spend your whole life with.

Every moment together with a loved one must really be treasured. Kahit na nakakainis pa siya minsan. Kahit na simpleng bagay hindi magawa. Kahit na paulit-ulit ka na lang sa pagsabi. Hindi naman talaga mauubos yung mga bagay na nakakainis. But one must always remember the things that brought you together and that God should be in the center of your relationship. When you think about it, hindi rin naman nauubos yung mga bagay na nakakatuwa eh.

Personally, whenever I am frustrated with something in my married life, I pray. Stories of real life couples whose lives together were cut short (such that of Maan and Jarwin) inspire me and makes me want to try harder to be a better wife and a better mom. Admittedly, I’m far from being a dutiful wife (naku, sa dami ng ginagawa ko, ni hindi ko maasikaso bahay namin eh) but I’m so blessed with a loving and supportive husband and an adorable and adoring daughter. But despite this, sometimes I forget and I make reklamo. And then when I’m calm, I ask myself, remember Oliver & Jenny [and Maan & Jarwin and Chiqui & Tin (another couple whose life together was cut short when Chiqui passed away)]? I’m sure they would prefer to be “bothered” by the petty things you are dealing with than by dealing with the loss of a loved one. And this effectively brings me back to reality and I give a short prayer of thanks for having my life and, yes, even my problems.