Ate Jia

When I first learned I was pregnant, part of me was sad because I felt that Jia was somehow being cheated of the time that I was supposed to spend with her. After all, I took a hiatus from work to be able to focus on her. So I guess it was pretty understandable why I felt what I felt.

Two days after learning I was pregnant, I asked J if we should tell Jia. He told me that he already did.  Kainis di ba? Wala ako sa moment na yun!  But since that, for me, signified that he was beginning to be happy about the pregnancy (we were both caught off-guard), I was happy that he already told Jia.

From then on, Jia has refused to be called Jia. She has to be called “Ate Jia”. Hindi pwedeng “Jia” or “Baby Jia”. Dapat “Ate Jia”. In fact, the other day, I called her “Anak” and she said “Mommy, no na ‘Anak’. Ate Jia!”

Since Jia will be almost three when Baby Patootie arrives, as early as now I am preparing her. They say that sibling jealousy is at its worst when a child is between three to five years old when his/her sibling is born. Coupled with the fact that I am able to really spend time with Jia just the past few months, the arrival of BP in May might confuse her and make her feel unwanted. Ngayon pa nga lang niya ako makakasama, maagaw pa ako! To try to avoid that from happening, I talk to her all the time and make her feel excited about BP’s arrival. I bought her a Sesame Street video about having another baby in the house. The video discusses how a big sister might feel when the new baby arrives. I also ask her to help me when BP arrives because she’ll be an Ate. I also assure her that when BP arrives, although she might feel that all the attention might be focused on the baby, Mommy will always still be there for her. Yeah, I know she’s too young to understand the things I am saying but hopefully she’ll feel the love behind the words.

For now, I cannot ask for anything more from Jia. She loves Baby Patootie! She’s excited every morning to say good morning. She pulls up my shirt to say hello and to kiss my belly button. I think she has this notion that the most direct way of talking to Patootie is through my belly button! Hahaha!

Jia is so much the ate as early as now. Whenever I tell her that I need to go to the doctor, she tells me not to. She says “Mommy, takot Baby Tootie doctor!” Since Jia now equates her doctor visits with injections, she admits that she’s takot of the doctor. So is adamant that Baby Tootie is also takot. That’s her way of protecting her baby brother/sister.

When I was first prescribed with insulin, Jia was asking what I was doing. I explained to her that Baby Patootie is sick and Mommy has to have injection. She pulled up my shirt, kissed my tummy, and proudly announced, “Ate Jia kiss Baby Tootie! Baby Tootie no na sick!”

About two weeks ago, I told her that I needed to go to the doctor and she has to stay at home. She cried (or a better description was, she was trying to cry to get my pity) but when I told her that I really needed to go to the doctor so BP will get well, she immediately stopped crying and said, “Wow! Baby Tootie no na sick! Well!”

But for me, the most poignant moments are during our prayer time. After thanking Papa Jesus for the the day, the food, etc, we ask for continued blessings. It goes like this, “Papa Jesus, please bless Daddy, Mommy, Ate Jia, Baby Patootie…”  I will stop after every word and Jia will repeat what I am saying but whenever we get to Ate Jia, she shakes her head and says “No… Baby Tootie” and then when I say “Baby Patootie”, that’s only the time she says “Ate Jia”. She puts herself behind Baby Patootie. Isn’t my baby just the sweetest?